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2003-12-25 | 11:46 p.m.

The best part of Christmas is the movie at the end.

Changing shoes. Having another sliver of pie. Thinking about a day in the near future, maybe even tomorrow, when no one will expect me to do anything.

A quiet house.


I can hear the dog knocking around in the kitchen, snuffling for scraps of ham. He stayed out in the yard all day and never made a sound.


Nothing overflowed, though the upstairs toilet refilled ominously high. What is it about plumbing and holidays?

Felony says she saw the mother and the sister-in-law exchange funny looks. Like her father, Felony has the habit of occasionally making an incendiary comment and then waiting to see if anything flares up. So I played it magnanimous. It's natural that they would find me strange, I explained. Compared to them, I am strange, and also very messy.


Felony was scowling much of the day because her sister got more and better presents. Two days ago, she was asking me worriedly if I thought she would get coal.

Felony's Agony

It's Not Easy Being Green



My mother stayed home, complaining of sciatica. We went to see her at eight o'clock. Criminy had a meltdown (directly related to her having gotten up before five a.m. this morning). She threw Jinx's paint set to the floor and spattered me with paint-water. I marched her into the bedroom, lecturing and threatening, but I could tell she was deliriously tired and no amount of talking would cure it.

The cause of her suffering remains obscure.


I should sleep. I think the not-in-laws want to have a family portrait taken tomorrow. My girls intend to wear elaborate formal dresses I bought on eBay. I don't know what to wear. Don't own an elaborate formal dress, though I do have a couple of fussy blouses. Even money it'll be a fussy blouse.

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