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2001-11-19 | 12:56 p.m.

Duff sends me the link to an IQ test. Though I am in the middle of something else (okay, a different diary entry, big whoop), I start taking it, half-thinking there's a punch line at the end--that's it not for real (even though it says "this test is no joke" on the front page--durr). Plus I am encouraged by the fact that there are "only" 36 questions. Next thing I know, I'm knee-deep in a serious IQ test, and I don't want to be there. Feels like I fell into math quicksand. Help me, I have other things to do! I can't just sit here taking an IQ test!

But I can't just make myself quit, either. So after agonizing over about half of it, which takes forever, I start trying to expedite. I skip over any question that seems too intimidating. This is much better. I'm flying now. Look at me, I'm taking an IQ test, and I'm flying right along! This doesn't hurt a bit! I skip maybe 10 or 12 questions. Buh-BYE.

At the end, it calculates my score. Boom, I've landed. I feel a little queasy. Now I regret skipping all those questions. Especially when it tells me that 29 percent of the population is smarter than I am. Ouch! The statistic about the number of people who are dumber doesn't interest me. Who cares about dumb people? Maybe I could have done a better job, but I crapped out, so now I'll never know for sure. It is the story of my entire life writ small. I could take the test over again, but that would mean returning to mathland, which I'm loathe to do. Maybe I would've gotten all the other questions wrong, anyway. But some of the questions that had seemed hard early on eventually crumbled under the pressure of scrutiny, like brown sugar that's been in the cupboard too long. It's likely that others would have as well. But I don't know, because I was in a hurry to return to avoiding my everyday obligations.

Do you ever think that it would be nearly impossible to be your own friend? I do. I annoy the hell out of myself, and would even more if I were someone else (who was also me).

Duff just told me he got a 149. Waaaaaahhhhh!

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