prev Fat chance next
2000-05-22 | 20:06:41

Just committed dietary hari-kiri. Ate 2-3 gourmet cookies (the kind with a 3-1/2 inch diameter) with a Pepsi and a fruit juice bar. My personal carbohydrate gods must be rattling their sabers. No, actually, I just checked and they're all sleeping.

I have 1903 messages in my inbox.

The house is sweltering. I am molting. I walk down into the basement garage, where it's darker and cooler, to check the mail for the umpteenth time, idly wondering if it's a holiday. Faintly, I hear the ICQ "uh oh!" and my pulse quickens.

Wonder what life will be like after the Internet? I used to say there was no going back but perhaps that is short-sighted.

I'm feeling swollen and stupid, so instead of more dreck from me, here are some quotes that I didn't write.

"[I've] decided that Moby-Dick was the greatest book ever

written. It leaves the reader with a few good lines and

the arrogant self-righteousness that comes only with great

suffering. I endured the chapter titled, "Measurement of the

Whale's Skeleton," and so should everybody else. Strength

through mutual agony--that's the dictum of the great literary canon, and if you think otherwise, you're an idiot."

--David Sedaris on reading "Moby Dick"

["The Life List," Esquire, December 1999]

"I've gone into thousands of [fortune teller's parlors], and have been told thousands of things, but nobody ever told me I was a policewoman getting ready to arrest her."

-- NYC detective

prev archive next
0 comments