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2002-02-01 | 9:44 a.m.

Dreamed I was fooling around with Kenny Rogers-esque man who turned out to be Kiki's (non-existent) husband. Kept shooing the kids away from the door. Whole mood was terribly '70s, dark-wood paneling swingersville. Then fooled around with Kiki herself, dream-conscious that I wasn't really into it. But I wanted to be nice--she is a good friend, after all--so I complemented her inexplicably small breasts and the dark freckles on her belly. That was the extent of it.

Later, while awake and dropping off kids at school, I saw Kiki and felt embarrassed as one does after an unexpected tryst. Here I had been intimate with her and she didn't even know it. I think I played it off well. She didn't seem to suspect anything.

The dream evolved into a time-travel opportunity, which makes sense given that I am still reading Gabaldon. I found myself in a restricted area near the end of World War II. First I stayed with a nice lady, possibly a relative, and then was taken into custody by American military personnel. I told them I was from the future and while they didn't believe me, they wanted to know about Japan. I said, "Uh, Hirohito? Emperor Hirohito, right?" and then I said, "The war ended when we dropped hydrogen bombs on two Japanese cities, Hiroshima and Nagasaki." I think of the all the origami cranes they made afterward, but it doesn't seem germane. And then I sit there for a while and I think, Duh! It wasn't a hydrogen bomb, you dumb-ass! It was an atomic bomb! They had just developed it, remember. So then I was like, "Oh, excuse me, it wasn't a hydrogen bomb, it was an atomic bomb." So then they look at each other and say, "Who will develop the atomic bomb?" and I say, "Edmund Teller." And then more time passes and I think, "Jesus! It wasn't Edmund Teller! It was the Manhattan Project!" So I'm like, "Um, I made a mistake. Edmund Teller develops another bomb, later. An even worse bomb. I forget who develops the atomic bomb. I think it was the Manhattan Project." (I'm thinking Teller --> nuclear, which is also wrong. He was the father of the hydrogen bomb.)

So they sort of decide that I'm some kind of spy, and I argue with them that I can't be a spy, because I don't know enough.

When I wake up, I am still in dream mode. I think of all the other things I can tell them, about Normandy, Hitler in the bunker, the Nuremberg trials. It occurs to me that I could go look up my parents, who haven't even met yet. During the war, my Dad went to Normandy. At various times, he was in Aruba, Dutch West Indies, The Philippines, and New Orleans. I try to think of ways I might befriend them without telling them I'm their kid. I have the sense that they might be disappointed to find out that I am a child of theirs. Especially my Dad.

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