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2004-01-07 | 8:48 p.m.

Jinx has been plagued by some sort of mysterious abdominal pain. He complained near continuously for twelve hours on Monday night. Last night we spent in the emergency room. (In my mind�s eye I see us getting ready to go, with him on my hip--he�s heavy, even for five--going down the basement stairs to find some clean pants in the dryer, while I�m wearing nothing but a sweatshirt, underwear, one white clog and one sheepskin slipper. Clunk, shoosh, clunk, shoosh, with one leg higher than the other, and the slipper is just a little too big.)

The doctors agree it must be �viral,� since his symptoms bear no resemblance to anything else.

I have also been without Internet access for three days. They promise to give you a connection that�s �always on,� but they lie, don�t they? Even as you�re signing the contract, you know it isn�t true.

Actually, I guess they don�t even bother with contracts anymore. It�s all about your numbers now.

Been thinking about my Dad. Guess it�s a little late to get to know him better (him being dead and all), but I still intend to try. Also started reading Steven Levine�s A Year to Live. I think this could be an important read for me. I�ve become less fearful of death over the years (as a kid, often I�d try to stay awake all night because I was terrified of dying in my sleep). But I am so quick to regret; I�d like to do more now to make things easier on myself later.

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