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2001-07-17 | 10:08 a.m.

Here in Greater Loserville yesterday, some drunk woman smothered her two-month-old baby when she passed out while breastfeeding. The baby isn't quite dead but likely brain-damaged. (The article didn't mention whether the baby was already brain-damaged from having a roaring drunk for a mother.) Now I'm wondering if we'll get to hear anyone crabbing that breastfeeding and a family bed are dangerous, even though every scrap of information you ever get about family bed will always say DON'T DO IT IF YOU'RE DRUNK OR LOADED. Because under those circumstances, it's dangerous. But no advice or instruction is good enough for a drunk. They know everything.

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